Holy Sex! How Pursuing Jesus Will Bring You Laid | HuffPost Amusement

Notice: The following post is written by
Dr. Smartass
, eSarcasm’s health columnist and gynecologist-in-training.

Dear Dr. Smartass,

I am 24 as well as have just had gender with two girls, each of who happened to be long-lasting girlfriends. We particular wish only get out and acquire laid now, but i can not apparently see through the producing on phase using the girls I’m internet dating (and I also don’t want to enter another long-term thing yet). I’m not a nightclub style of guy. Where else may I satisfy women that are just seeking to have a good time?


Dave-O, you are in chance: many females tend to be
selecting no-strings lovin’
, and you also do not need to strike the groups to obtain ‘em. Not that your own reliable digital doc understands something about these matters first-hand — as I told Mrs. S, that bodacious blonde inside my workplace a week ago was all of our brand-new assistant. She was just under my work desk to think about some missing data.

Digressions aside, though, where in case you seek out your brand new playmate? Really, Dave, the answer may amaze you.

Just before attempted to deliver your, er, sermon, let me describe what exactly is really going on right here. The pew-screw link, the thing is, isn’t totally coincidental. Somewhat,
the researchers speculate
, the
higher level of humping
may be as the religious girls really miss a feeling of connectedness.

“assuming one is intimately linked with various other humankind which interconnectedness and equilibrium are indispensable may lead someone to think intimate closeness has a divine or transcendent high quality by itself,” one of the learn’s writers clarifies.

So my personal prescription for your family, Dave: decide to try kneeling down alongside an attractive girl next Sunday day. If your prayers tend to be answered, she might end kneeling down again later on that night. Just don’t get greedy and expect the next coming.

There defintely won’t be a necessity to utilize a lame line,

Once you fulfill her in a location that’s divine.

Start your mind and search for holy flame.

Afterwards that night, she will be phoning God’s name.

Hang with Dr. Smartass at
, your one-stop area for you a geek Humor Gone Wild. Lately voted the majority of Objectionable site of 2009!